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ハートの光のろうそく

社内恋愛でのつらい失恋から立ち直るための心の持ち方

ろうそく

好きになった相手に恋人がいて諦めなければならなかったり、告白を断られてしまったり、付き合っていた相手との別れを迎えてしまったりした時というのは本当につらい想いをすることになります。

失恋をしたときに相手の事を何とも思わなくなっていれば、そんなつらい想いをすることもありません。しかし実際には、そのようにスッキリと割り切ることができるような失恋はなかなか出来ないものです。

ましてや社内恋愛での失恋であれば、相手のことをまだまだ好きであった場合もそうですが、逆に相手を嫌いになった場合でも、その失恋から立ち直るにはそれ相当の精神力と時間が必要になってきます。

今回は、そんなつらい社内恋愛での失恋の時の心の持ち方について、どうしていけば立ち直ることができるのかについて見ていきましょう。

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社内恋愛での失恋がつらくなる原因

最初に、社内恋愛で失恋した場合につらくなってしまう原因には、どのような事があるからなのかについて見ていくことにしましょう。

相手と顔を合わせないわけにはいかない

目

同じ会社で働いている以上、プライベートで例えどんなことがあっても顔を合わせないわけにはいかないのが社内恋愛の特徴です。それはつらい失恋をした時こそ最も痛感することでしょう。

相手がどんなに自分に対して割り切っているからとごく普通に接してきたとしても、あなたが相手に対して複雑な感情を抱いていたらそのつらさは変わりませんよね。

相手が見せるその優しさがかえってつらいという時もあれば、全く相手にしてもらえなくなるという時のつらさもあります。

社内恋愛で失恋したときに感じるつらさは、他の恋愛では感じることのない大変なストレスを抱えることになってしまうのです。

周りの人たちと互いに気を遣う

同僚や仲間内に社内恋愛を知られていた場合、失恋が原因で仕事に影響するのではと気を遣わせたり気を遣ったりする人間関係への気遣いもつらさの原因になります。

また、失恋で極端に低下したモチベーションでの仕事というのも大変気が重く感じるものです。このような状態の自分を人に見られることすら嫌だと思う人が殆どでしょう。

当人同士もさることながら、周囲の人たちとの人間関係にも支障をきたすかもしれないという事が社内恋愛での失恋では大きなつらさになってくるものです。

社内恋愛の失恋でのつらい状況から立ち直るには

では、こういった社内恋愛での失恋のつらさから立ち直るためには、一体どうすればいいのでしょうか?

自分の気持ちをいったん整理してみる

まずは、失恋で立ち直る為にそのつらい状況を打破しなければなりません。そのためには、自分の気持ちをよく整理するところから始めましょう。

そうキッパリと整理がつくものではないかもしれませんが、自分は一体相手に対してどんな感情を抱いているのか、相手のどこが好きなのか、一体なぜ失恋に至ってしまったのか、なぜ諦めがつかないのかを整理していくのです。

失恋の事実を自分で見つめなおすことになりますからつらいことですが、日記に書いたりノートに書きだしてみることで改めて自分の気持ちを整理することができるのです。

自分の気持ちを整理することができれば、そこから自分はどう振舞っていくといいのかが分かってきます。それが社内恋愛の失恋から立ち直るための第一歩になるという事を忘れないでください。

諦めるor諦めない

自分の気持ちに整理がついた時点で、失恋の相手を諦めるか諦めないかをまず決断することになります。

それには決して自分の感情を一方的に考えるのではなく、相手の立場もよく考えて判断するようにしましょう。なぜならお互いに同じ会社で仕事をしている以上、お互いの今後をいい方向に転換させていかなければならないからです。

もし相手に恋人がいない場合や、別にあなたの事が嫌いではないと言われた場合には当然一度っきりの失恋で諦めてしまうのはもったいないでしょう。ひょっとしたらもっと互いのことを知っていけば相手もあなたのことを好きになってくれるかもしれません。

逆に恋人がいたりして諦めなければならないときには、相手との関係を純粋な会社の同僚という関係に変えていくことが必要です。

口で言うのは簡単といわれてしまうかもしれませんが、自分の感情をコントロールしようと思えば必ずできるものなのです。要はその努力の仕方が大切なのです。

立ち直るという事

失恋から立ち直るという事は、いかなる決断をしたとしてもその気持ちが前向きであるという事なのではないでしょうか?

諦めないと決断した場合も、その後の自分の言動が前向きであればきっと相手から見直してもらえる自分になることもできるかもしれません。

諦めなければならない場合にも、諦めるための心の持ち方に切り替えた時には前向きな事を考えられるはずです。例えば他に素敵な人を探してみたり、相手を見返すぐらいに自分磨きを始めたり。

社内恋愛での失恋に対して立ち直るためには、まずは仕事をきちんとこなしていくことが最も大切です。プライベートの出来事に関係なく、ちゃんと仕事ができる姿はきっと周りの人たちが見てくれています。

例え社内恋愛や失恋の事実を知らない人でも、あなたが仕事を頑張っているという事はそれに関係なく評価してもらえることですから、自分の社内での存在価値は失恋相手だけではない、むしろそれ以外の上司や同僚に認めてもらう事なんだという事を決して忘れないようにしましょう。

まとめ:社内恋愛の失恋から立ち直るには自分を見つめなおす事

別れや告白を断られることで感じる失恋のつらさはとても大きなものですが、社内恋愛の場合その場所は本来仕事をする所だという事があなたにとって一つの支えになることでしょう。

その中で、もう一度自分を見つめなおして前向きな気持ちに切り替えていくことこそが、社内恋愛での失恋の痛みから立ち直るための特効薬になるという事を、どうか心の片隅においていただければ幸いです。

もしあなたがつらい状況にあるのなら、一日も早く明るい日々を取り戻せるようになるよう強く祈っています。

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