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社内恋愛での失恋をバネに自分を大きく成長させる

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失恋の痛みを持っていると、なかなか前向きな自分になれないものですよね。それが社内恋愛での失恋となると、その環境がもたらす悩みや苦しみの種はますます大きなものです。

しかし、なかなか立ち直れないと考える人でも、心のどこかでは早く立ち直って元気な自分を取り戻したいと願っているはず。

今回は、つらい社内恋愛の失恋から立ち直り、その経験をバネに自分を成長させるための方法を紹介していくことにしましょう。

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失恋で得るもの

人は互いに愛を育むことで得るものも大きいですが、考え方と行動次第では失恋でもさらに大きなものを得ることができます。

ひとまずは冷静になって、一体自分が失恋で得ることができるものには何があるのかについて、どうか考えてみていただければと思います。

心の痛みを知る

迷路

失恋の痛みというのは、大変つらいものですね。だからこそ、その大きなつらさを味わったことのあるあなたは、他人の心の痛みを理解できるようになるのです。

心の痛みは目で見ることは当然できませんが、その痛みを感じ取ってあげることはできます。人は誰一人として自分だけで生きていくことはできません。すべて一切を自給自足で誰の助けも借りずに生きている人などいません。

そんな他人との関わりでもっとも大切なのが思いやりです。思いやりのある人は多くの人から愛されますし、他人を思いやる心で自分が救われることもあります。

人の痛みを理解できるようになったという事が、あなたにとっての財産だということを忘れないようにしていただくといいでしょう。

仕事の大切さを実感できる

社内恋愛という環境では、相手と顔を合わせなければならないというつらさがどうしても付きまといます。そんな状況を少しでも忘れるために、きっと仕事に集中する人も多いでしょう。

言い方は悪いのかもしれませんが、仕事を社内恋愛の失恋のつらさからの逃げ場にすることができるということは、仕事があなたを救ってくれる存在だという事なのです。

本来仕事をするために就いた職場ですから仕事をするのは当然ですが、その大切さを改めて実感できるということは大変大きなことなのです。

何も無く平凡な毎日で仕事の大切さを実感し続けることは、実際には難しいことでしょう。何かしらの困難があるからこそ仕事の重要性を感じ取ることができるということに喜びを感じるようになれれば、あなたはきっと大きく成長できることでしょう。

失恋の経験が宝となる

つらい社内恋愛の失恋から立ち直ったとき、あなたはその分大きな経験を生かせるようになっているはずです。

人生いつ何が起きるかは誰にもわかりません。素敵なこともたくさんあるでしょうし、苦い思いをすることもあるでしょう。でも、経験が在るか無いかでその人生の波の乗り越え方は全く違います。

つらい経験であればあるほど、困難が小さく見えるものです。今後の人生で困難が立ちはだかる度に、その社内恋愛の失恋から得た経験が大きく役に立つのだということを心の片隅に置いておくといいでしょう。

失恋をバネにして自分を成長させるために

社内恋愛の失恋の痛みからちょっと冷静になることができたのなら、次は失恋という状況を自分の人生でプラスに転換させるためにどう行動すればいいのかを考える時だといえます。

次の恋愛のため、また自分をさらに向上させるために、行動に移す勇気を出して動き出すためのポイントを見ていきましょう。

自己分析する

痛みを引きずらないためには、自分のことをもう一度よく理解することが大切です。何故今回の恋愛に失恋したのか、相手に何を求め何が不満だったのか、自分は何を求められて何が足りなかったのか。

自分の良い所が見つかったら、それは伸ばしていけばいいのです。欠点が見つかったら、正していくためには何が必要かを考えましょう。長所を伸ばすことができたら、それは自信となりやがては周りの人から見ても大きな魅力となって映ることでしょう。

まずは、自分が一体どういう人物なのかということを明確にすることから始めるのです。

価値観を磨く

自分という人物を見つめ直すことができたら、次はどういう人物になりたいのかを考えて行動に移しましょう。

その中で、見つけることができた長所を磨いて短所を正していくことが、価値観を磨くことになります。

自分の価値観を磨き高めるということは、即ち他人から見た自分の魅力が大きくなるということなのです。周りからより必要とされる人になることができるのです。

周りはあなたのことが好きになってあなたを必要としてくれるでしょう。人との繋がりの中で、きっとあなたの努力を認めて助けになってくれる人が出てくるものです。

価値観を磨くこと、つまり自分を磨くことが自分の居場所を作り出すことになるのです。自分を救ってくれるのは周りですが、その周りを動かすのも自分だということを覚えておいてください。

仕事に対してさらにプロ意識を持つ

社内恋愛が失恋してしまう前は、きっと大変な仕事も高いモチベーションでこなすことができたことでしょう。

確かにつらい失恋をした後ではモチベーションはなかなか上げたり保ったりするのは難しいものです。しかし、先述のとおり、あなたを救ってくれるのも仕事です。

今まで以上にプロ意識を持って、仕事をしにこの場所へ来ているんだということを意識することで、やがて失恋の痛みを徐々に解消することができるでしょう。

仕事へのプロ意識を高く持つことで達成感も大きくなります。自分の仕事への熱意がやがて自分を救ってくれることにきっと気づく時が来ることでしょう。

リフレッシュする

人間は、倒れるまで頑張り続けるなんて事はできません。どこかで一息つかなければモチベーションを維持することは難しいものです。

頑張る時はしっかり頑張る、でも頑張ったらちょっと自分を見つめなおしてリフレッシュする、これが立ち直るためのモチベーションを持続させるコツなのです。

失恋したとき、最初に自分を見つめ直して決断したとおりの自分に近づいているのか、当時の自分より成長できているのかを客観的に眺めながら、休息を忘れないようにすることで息の詰まるような想いを開放することができるでしょう。

新しいことに取り組んでみる

相手との関係を思い出すことで失恋の痛みをぶり返してしまうようであれば、それまでの日常を変えるために何かにチャレンジするという事はとても効果があります。

何より、新しいことに取り組むと、意外で新たな自分を発見することができます。その新たな自分を発見する事で、それまでの悩んでいた自分がなんだかバカらしく思えたりするものです。

それまでとは違った自分の一面を見つけることができたら、きっと次のステップに向けて大きな一歩を踏み出す勇気が持てることでしょう。

新たな幸せに向けて、何かにチャレンジするということはとても素敵なことです。自分の人生の未来を信じて、どうか明るい気持ちで前向きに仕事や生活ができるようになってください。

失恋のおくすり (アスペクト文庫)
バンビス スノーフラワー
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まとめ:失恋は人生のスパイス

人生の中で自分を成長させてくれるものは成功と失敗です。何かをやり遂げたときに人は大きく成長しますが、それ以上に失敗したことで大きく自分を変えたり成長させることができるものです。

最後にもう一度失恋をバネにするためのポイントをおさらいしておきます。社内恋愛という環境での独特のつらい失恋も、自分を大きくするための人生のスパイスだと思って、前向きな明るい気持ちで新たな日々をすごせるようになりましょう。

  • 自己分析をする
  • 価値観を磨く
  • 仕事に対してさらにプロ意識を持つ
  • リフレッシュする
  • 新しいことに取り組んでみる

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Check Also

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行動から見極めよう!社内恋愛における男性からの脈ありサイン

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