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困る 怒る
困る 怒る

内向的な人が感情タイプになってしまう訳とは?

困る

内向的な人は、学校での教室の中でも社会にでてからも自分の意見を何も言わないで、他の人の意見を聞いて行動しています。

または、自分一人の世界に入り込み、あまり、他の人とは関わりを持たずにいます。自分の殻にとじこもって、人とは関わらないため、他の人は、この人は自分の意見を言わないなと勘違いしてしまいます、

しかし、どうしても自分の意見を言わないないと行けない状態に内向的な人がなってしまったとき、怒りながら言ったり泣きながら言ったり感情的に意見を言ってしまい、周りの人がその言動や行動を見て引いてしまうことになります

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内向的な人はうまく伝えられない

考える

なぜ、内向的な人は、感情的になってしまうことが多いのかを考えてみました。内向的な人は、どうしたら自分以外の人に自分の気持ちを伝えたらいいのかわからないのです。
自分を表現することがとても苦手です。

こんなひとを見たときありませんか?

  • 間違えられて訂正を求めるとき怒った口調で言ってしまう
  • 相手がきっと悪気はないとわかっていて、あまりいってはいけないとわかっていて相手に伝えなければいけない場合、うまく表現できない人は感情的に相手に間違っていることを伝えてしまいがちです。そんなつもりはないけれど、そう伝えてしまうので、相手はそんなに言わなくてもいいのでは?と逆に嫌なきもちにさせてしまいます。

  • 自分はかしたくないけれど、貸してと言われて感情てきに泣いて貸さないは相手
  • 子供の貸し借りでよくあることですが、「まだ使いたい」けれど、「貸して」と言われたら自分の意見が言えずに黙ってしまい、「いい?」と持って行かれると泣いて、時には手をだして反抗をしてしまい、意地悪と思われたりしてしまうのです。小さい頃は特に自分の意見を言える子はイイコと思われがちですが、内向的な子は本当は我慢をしているのです。

  • 意見があるけれど、言えなくてイライラはする
  • 自分の意見を言いたいと思っていても、相手の事を考えすぎて結局伝えられなくて気持ちだけが先走ってしまい、イライラしてしまっている人もいます。
    これを言いたい、自分はこう思っているという意見をうまく相手に伝える事ができないのです。

自分の意見をすんなり言える人には、なぜ、自分の意見を言うだけなのに、イライラしたり考えこむのかわからないでしょう。

逆に感情的になってしまう人も自分の意見を言うのに、こんな風になってしまうことに自己嫌悪してる人もいるでしょう。

けれども、内向的人は特に考えてしまうのです。自分の意見を主張して迷惑がかかったりしないのか?自分の意見を賛成してくれる人はいないのではないか?そう考えているうちにうまく相手に伝えることが出来ずに、感情的になって相手に伝えてしまうのです。

内向的なひとは自分の世界に入り込んでしまっています。人との関わりあいをさけて自分の中に入り込んでいる方が楽だと思っている人もいますし、人とかかわることで難しいことを避けたいと思う傾向もあります。他の人の事は目を向けていない人も多いのですが、人が生きていくうえで、買い物をするにしても病院に行ったりしたりするのも、必ず人と接しなければ生きていくことができません。人とかかわることが少ない分、自分の意見をどう伝えたらいいのかという経験自体をしていなくて、人に自分の意見を言う事に慣れていないのです。

自分の中だけに生きていたいと思っていてもどうしても相手に意見を言わなければいけないときに、その今までの経験や自分の意見を伝える表現力がないために怒ってしまっていたり、泣いてしまっていたりといった感情的に相手にぶつけてしまっているのです。

内向的な人こそ強い人
内向的な人こそ強い人

posted with amazlet at 14.05.20
ローリー ヘルゴー
新潮社
売り上げランキング: 25,087

まとめ:人と関わってみよう

なぜ、自分が人と話す時に感情的になってしまうのだろうと悩んでしまっていたのなら、それはチャンスです。自分で自分の感情的な部分に気が付いているのですから、それだけで内向的な性格から抜け出しているのです。つまり、感情タイプから抜け出せるということですね。

自分の意見をしっかり言えない事は誰でもあるのです。感情的になってしまって意見を言ってしまうから嫌われているのではと思っているからと言って引きこもってはいけません。自分に気が付いただけで、それは外向的にもうなっているのです。だから、これから人と関わってみましょう。失敗は誰でもあります。子供でも小さいころは自分の意見を感情的に泣いたり怒ったり人に伝えていたけれども、それでは相手には伝わらないと気が付いて自分の意見をしっかり言えるようになるのです。

子供のころからの経験で人は自分の意見を行けるようになってくるのです。今からでも遅くはありません。いつからでも人と関わることで人は外向的になれます。感情的にならずに自分の意見が言えるようにいつの間にかなるのです。

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